Some well-intentioned parent started the sports snack schedule for good not evil. But it was a slippery slope they tread, veering into veritable snack buffets with options, halftime mini snacks and Pinterest-worthy nametags. How did this happen? It started innocently enough when we brought our kids a post-game granola bar or single-serve bag of chips with a drink. They worked hard, put up a valiant fight and honestly, if they lost, a snack always softened the blow. And then came these and these and we started getting a complex. (Although that dolphin is really kinda cute.) We overheard someone talking about halftime snacks and giving kids an array of choices, like ordering from a sideline menu with no extra charge for wet wipes. This wasn’t how we remembered it. If someone’s parents were feeling really generous, they might have taken us for end-of-the-year ice cream. Or maybe we’d all just meet there. Today it’s almost as good as ordering room service. Do we sound bitter? Or old? Don’t answer that. After some self-reflection, we decided there’s no right answer. We have equal respect for the team snack scheduler and super star who hand stenciled nametags as we do for the dad who threw oranges to everyone straight from the bag. One week you may have all the time in the world, the next it’s a miracle if you remembered to wash your daughter’s uniform. And aren’t we really there to watch them learn the game, learn how to win and lose graciously and have fun? One more thing. We are huge fans of cheating. Not in the game, but on the sidelines. Like buying doughnuts with white frosting and drawing on the soccer or baseball stitching with colored icing. Or starting with run of the mill bags, bottles or boxes and printing team labels to stick on, making them look customized without much work. Everything doesn’t have to happen from scratch and we love a good shortcut. We also love the dad who tossed out the oranges. They did have to catch them, right?